Nobody Else Can Make You Happy

     In high school, especially, we get trapped into our mind set that having a boyfriend or girlfriend will make us happy. One of the most fundamental lessons that school cannot teach us is that no thing and no one can make you happier than you can make yourself.
    Our happiness is our responsibility. We know what it takes for us to be balanced. Sure a boyfriend or girlfriend can make us happy while we are with them, but what about when we aren't? You have to do what it is that makes you happy all of the time whether that be music, sports, reading, dancing, writing or anything else. I know all to well that life is too short to not do what you love. If laughter is the best medicine, then happiness is a cure all.
     Don't depend your happiness on other people or things. Only you know what can get you smiling and feeling your best. While things and people can enhance these feelings, you have to a have a firm foundation for them to rest upon.

     As the first quote states,  you have to celebrate everything that your life is right now. There is not enough time in a day to spend worrying about what you think your life should or could be. You have to make the best of everything you have. Don't cheap yourself out of a world of joy and excitement. Make your life worth it. There is no such thing as too much happiness!

The Worst Word In Any Language Is "I"

     It is one thing to have self-confidence and be self-sufficient, but it is another thing to be self-absorbed. Everything is not about you. Now we all know that one person who consistently talks about themselves and after a while doesn't it make you not want to talk to them? There is nothing more monotonous than hearing someone talk about themselves. Don't be that person.
     You don't have to announce your self-confidence to the world. Simply by being yourself, the world will know that you are confident. When you are continuously absorbed in yourself, it actually makes people wonder if maybe your over confidence in yourself is a cover up for your insecurities. When you embrace yourself you will radiate. However, embracing yourself doesn't mean you need to brag about yourself of have a large ego or be too proud.
    Being involved in both band and choir I have been taught to let go of myself to better the group. One of the most important aspects of being in a musical group or sports team, or any other group for that matter, is being one with your teammates. If even one person outwardly rates themselves above someone else, the group cannot function effectively or reach its truest potential. When you bring yourself into something where it doesn't belong, you change the dynamic and not in a positive way.

     So many activities, teach you to be a part of a team but don't always teach you to release your self and become one. In school, when you are a part of a group for a project, there is no need for you to hype yourself up because you are getting the same score as all the members of your group. It is hard to respect someone who can't care about anything more than themselves. Be the person who thinks of others first. As Hans F. Hansen said, "People that know they are important, think about others. People that think they are important think about themselves."

It's Okay To FAIL!

     Despite what we are taught in school, it is perfectly okay to fail. In fact, everyone fails eventually. It is better to accept that now and prepare yourself for when you do fail. Failure is the greatest life teacher.
     In school, the goal is to learn the material set before us and be able to pass a test to prove that we understand it. However, there is no room for failure in this system. I'm not saying that failure should be accepted, but rather that it be viewed as a step towards success. What I mean by this is that it should be okay for students to fail at homework or practice tests because if they fail, they can learn from their mistakes and succeed in the end. In my Spanish 3 class, my teacher gave us a surprise reading quiz. I only finished three questions and she told me that she wanted me to do poorly because then when I got it perfect in the end, she will know that I really understand what I'm doing.  At first I was kind of disappointed by my score of 2.5 out of 9, but when I remembered what she said, it didn't bother me because it left a lot of room for improvement.
     Failure teaches us humility and makes us rethink our course of action. Failure should be taken as a sign that something needs to change. It should never be accepted as a result but utilized during the process. Failure is just a way of saying that you know how not to do something. As Thomas Edison once said, "I have not failed, I've just found 10,000 ways that don't work."

Relationships: More Impactful Than Material Goods

     Our relationships are more important than even the most expensive of material goods. This is something that people are all to commonly unaware of. Americans and people all over the world are so concerned about having the newest phone, the fastest computer and the most expensive car, because we are obsessed with things.
     With the recent passing of black Friday, I was reminded of the idea that people go crazy to get good deals on Christmas presents for their friends and family. Not to make an assumption about all those people, but they seemed to have an intense urge to get the best gift so that the recipient will, in a sense, love them. This mind set is wrong because things don't produce love, people do. Your sister or best friend will still love you no matter what you get them.  If love or appreciation is what you seek, work on building your personal relationship with the person, like spending time together, instead of depending on a material gift.
     Though your relationship with your phone or TV can bring you joy and happiness, it is no comparison to the joy and happiness of comradery and friendship. Spending even one hour laughing with friends or family will brighten your whole day, whereas an hour of TV time is only used as a way to pass time rather than using it.
     There are, however, several situations where there can be a combination of relationships and material things that can be beneficial. For example, spending time communicating with friends or family via skype or facetime. This requires a material object, but is just as rewarding as having a real face to face conversation. The same can be said about talking on the phone with your loved ones. In these cases, the end justifies the means.
       Despite the exceptions, a personal relationship is far more important and beneficial than having the newest and greatest of things.

     

TV Is Not Real Life

    While this may come as a shock to some people, TV is not real life. At our age we are generally growing out of the "I want to be a _____ when I grow up" phase. Therefore, we go into a search for a career that is practical and interesting to us. All to commonly this turns us to the TV. We watch shows like CSI, NCIS and Grey's Anatomy,  and state that we want to be a federal agent,homicide detective or a doctor. Some people watch the food channel or HGTV and decide to be a pastry chef or an interior designer. While all these professions are very legitimate, our picture of what the job is really like is distorted by the television.
     I have to admit that for a time, I wanted nothing more than to be just like Abby Schuto from NCIS. I have since grown out of this phase because I realized that not all forensic scientists live the life of luxury that Abby lives in the show. The other thing that I realized was that I need to be able to chose what I'm going to do for the rest of my life for myself, without any false influences.
     I encourage all young people who are trying to decide what they want to do with their life, to turn your heads away from the TV and look into your life and find what makes you most happy and work with it. While television is great for entertainment, most of it is not an accurate depiction of a normal life in the real world. Get your inspiration from your life and not the life of your favorite character.
     

Life Has Not Done Away With Winners and Losers

     In order to maintain student's self esteem and confidence, schools have gotten rid of competition between students. Not that there was any super blatant competitiveness before, but there is even less now. This removal of competitive spirit does not bear any resemblance to the real world AT ALL. Between companies, between bosses, between coworkers; there is competition everywhere. And there is always an incentive for coming out on top.
     In school we are commonly given as many tries as we need to get the grade we want. In the real world, you get one chance to get it right and if you don't, someone else gets the job, promotion, or lead on the project. A well known fact of nature is that only the strong survive. This applies to life as well (literally and figuratively). The better you do things, especially the first time, the better off you will be.
     Life is a constant competition, despite what schools may have you believe. Teachers usually want every student to do well, whether that take one time for top students or ten times for the lower.  Life gives everyone one chance to get it right and thus it separates the winners from the losers. The other side of this thought is that some people will do whatever it takes to come out on top. The end does not justify the means. You have to keep the bigger picture in mind- remember that while it's okay to do your best, it's better to ensure that you go the extra mile to prove yourself.
     Lastly, though being the winner is always seen as better, you should never aim to beat anyone else. Rather you should strive to be the best you can possibly be. When you achieve our truest potential, you are a winner.

Be Nice To Nerds

     Kids who are classified as nerds, are often the ones who are picked on or laughed at because they chose to study instead of go to the movies or parties. However, what people need to realize is that someday they will most likely be working under one of these so called "Nerds."
     In high school, there is a large distinction between the sporty "Jocks" and the smart "nerds." Kids just assume that the most popular kids in school will be the most successful bosses and business owners. While is some cases this is true, in many cases, either the nerdy kids become the successful professionals or they are the ones in the popular person's company that make it successful.
     Sports are commonly embodied as the most important aspect of high school. But how often do people's hard work in a sport during high school pay off? Less than 10% of high school athletes go on to play professionally. Contrary to this, most kids who focus on learning, have a 3.5 GPA and up and took challenging classes, will be first choice on college application lists and eventually make more money. I don't say this to downgrade the benefit of playing sports or the people who participate in them, but rather to demonstrate a difference between realistic scenarios.
     Being a nerd is not at all a bad thing. People make being a nerd such a bad thing when it really is a term inferring intelligence. "Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one." -Bill Gates